Saturday, May 13, 2017

A Letter To My Old Self

Hello Self,



I have freed myself  from a personal challenge that had me locked up for years. It's like a prison on to myself, and I am out. Everything on the outside is so new because  it's changed, I have changed too. Now I'm not saying change is good or bad, it is what it is.

You get to a point in your life if you don't like something that's going on in your life and you've had enough - it's time to let it go. The baggage of the past slows out progress to move forward, to achieve what is intended for us to do - find our true purpose of our existence. In my case, my writings and photography.

It's not so much leaving people behind, sometimes it's a change of the way the dynamics of a relationship - regardless of what it is. If you want your relationships to work, then put the effort out and  do it. Communicate and make your intentions known and listen to the feedback. At least come to some agreement. Some people will get it, and some won't. But my point is, You have to come clean with yourself. 

Make yourself known to yourself that you are going to be true to yourself and go for what you desire out of life. Those that love you will come for the ride, cheer you on and that's the best offer  anyone can receive as they wish the best and be there for you. Some people you may have to let go because they serve no purpose in seeing you achieve. They just want to stall your progress - those need to do some personal cleansing and look for the beauty within themselves if they choose too.

There has been chaotic energy around me the last couple of months that brought me to this point. It's energy gave me this will to be free. I feel richer for life, I want to breathe and share my love and kindness with you. I love myself so much now, that I can take whatever you have to offer. Only if you  do this with the love. I can understand pain as we all have it whether it be physical, mental, spiritual, emotional or all rolled up as one.

We each must learn that it is up to us to embrace our wishes, our dreams and make them come true no matter how long it takes. Never take yourself for granted and know in time, all wishes and dreams will arrive, when the universe says you are ready.

I can only  write from experience and look back with loving memories that I cannot return to that state of living. I am  free to be creative with all aspects of my life and wish to share them  with you and with that special person to complete the puzzle of my life.

Each piece is a puzzle if we don't look in the pile to search for it. Though we have to move forward no matter if we don't want to. Eventually, you feel a snap and say it's time, so here I am.
I am not saying something to you that you all ready know, maybe you don't. We are all different and cleansing the soul, varies from person to person.

Some people have to go away and figure things out. I was alone for a good number of years so I am compelled to be among the masses to figure what's out there and take risks. At the end of each day when I say my prayers and affirmations. I ask forgiveness for any wrong doing or sins I may have committed, and go to bed with a clear conscious. This is my way of moving forward.

I can't tell you it's easy, nor tell you it's hard. All I can tell you is, if you wish or desire to make things better in your life, then the choice I  had to make is taking the risk. no matter the outcome, I know I tried my best.

I  can think all I  want, over think much? Yes, done that too. I can't weigh pros and cons too much cause that can drive me crazy. I am taking it as a reflection of what to keep or change in my life. I am tired of putting things in the back of my mind saying later, I am done with it.

I am tired of my survival mode which I had to see things in this way or that way - it is what it is and I have to accept it and be open to compromise or come to an agreement with myself and others.

I also have to listen to my heart and allow it to speak. Take the risk to tell someone how I  feel about them and accept the outcome. Again, feeling  good that I tried, and did my best and move forward with or without them. But I will not miss any opportunity in deny my feelings - that is something I did lots in the past.  I am done with that past, too.

We all connect for a reason. Whatever that reason is will reveal itself as time goes by.
We can't force, nor be confused trying to figure a situation  it out. Maybe we're suppose to learn something from all of this .So I am allowing  things to flow and not push for answers because they will come when I am ready to receive them.

I am so into flow cause I have pushed myself too much. I know I have been very hard on myself and  felt I had to be gentle with my surroundings. Continue being true to myself and with others. I have no time for bullshit. I desire personal balance  in both  my mind and  heart. I feel stronger than ever. I see things brighter clearer and welcome this passion for life.
I am happy and in love with myself. I desire that for all. This is the new me and I am embracing it all.

I wish you to be happy and love yourself, too. It's a beautiful feeling.
When you have that feeling, nothing can stop you from moving ahead.

To be happy with love in my heart  is the only forever feeling I want in my life, and I am in it to win what's coming.
I am free to receive.
I have just said goodbye to my old self.
I love you,
Me


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