Conversations That Last All Night

 When talking to a friend there will be times a window is open due to mutual trust.We feel comfortable to share piece of ourselves to them because we've been invited to. With this honor, it is only respectable with great care and consideration, I return with respect and love, something deep to share with them. And the conversation can go all night. (the picture is of dawn I took a few weeks ago)

Tatts:  You are truly gifted, Sweet Kat

 

Kat: Thank you, Tatts. I think being gifted has been a hinder for me. Not many people like hanging with someone like me.  More for my talent than for me as a person.

Tatts: They misread you. So sad.

Kat:  Yes, I know I have often been misread. That I know well. I suppose that's why I'm still single.

Tatts: You must have been very vibrant and bubbly.

Kat: In a way, I still am very much like that. I heard that yesterday at a going away gathering I had.

Tatts:  You are still very vibrant.

Kat: The only thing that changes is your body gets older... and if one accepts the changes... you can grow older gracefully. And some of us look good well. I know I do and I'm happy for that. lol

Tatts: Yes. I agree. You are very different from the girls I know here.

Kat: Thank you. Well, yeah I know I am very different for sure. I never wanted to be like other people. That's the beauty of being an individual... being truly you.

Tatts: So correct, Sweetie

Tatts: I guess you can't keep up any more, Sweetie.

Kat: You know all through the years I see the same complaints with people saying they really want a nice person for a relationship.... but fool around with extreme naughty people that just want to play and are not relationship material at all or they are in between relationships. They never tell you what they want and leave you hanging. They say one thing and want something else.
I was never into mind games. And I won't settle for just anyone either.

Tatts: The sincere ones are very very rare to find, Sweet Kat

 Kat: You got that right. That's why I'm alone.

Tatts: You know. The girl I share accommodation with... we have an open relationship. It's two years and a bit. I know one day it will be over. I know she is into others. it's so hard.

Kats: making tea

Tatts:  Alright

Kat: Yeah it must be hard for you. I couldn't do it (open relationship). I'm so fucking loyal - even to myself. I respect relationships of all kinds. When I come across someone that's in a relationship and they want to fool around with me, I question their devotion, their loyalty... and I'm like, No way.

Tatts: You don't know all about me, Kat.

Tatts: While reading this thread from the start, a friend stumbled on that info. He sent a pm regretting what I had faced when 17.

Kat: Likewise you don't know all about me either. But what I have shared I have conveyed with sincerity. There has been way more hardship before the cancer, before sister's suicide.
as we get to know each other, we allow a bit more as time goes by. So I hope you get your PM.

Tatts: Must be very good. I won't write any more about myself. Sorry.

Tatts: Bad times in our lives. Alas.

Kat: I understand. I am not one to reveal on a public post. If one ask a question I will answer what I feel can be appropriate to me and to the one I am answering. If I feel it's too personal, there is PM for that. and I respect that. Most of my friendships from EP and now here were based on true sincerity within each other. It's nice to have good friendships and I remain extremely stubborn to the vow of loyalty.

Tatts: I lack the maturity you possess.

Kat:  well believe me when I tell you, maturity comes with age and experience. Maturity comes to all of us...at different times different situations. I relish that I am constantly maturing into a quirky wise woman. lol! You are an old soul, Tatts.

Much like I was at your age. I have a forever young heart and I can never change that. lol

Tatts: And I act on the little common sense I have.

Kat: And I am so glad you do have Common sense... I can tell and I like that in you, Tatts Sweetie.

Kat:  Common Sense is a precious valuable quality and rare this day and age. Selfless acts are rare than in my younger days. Consideration for others lacks so much now I am abhorred by the behavior of people.
If I had had a child, I know they would be loving respectable caring human beings because that is the way I am and live.

Tatts: I trust what you wrote here. I have battled odds since i was 17. Lost mom to cancer. Could not adjust to step mother. Moved out. Have been living like that. Letting my instincts guide me.

Kat:  And your instincts is exactly what you ought be going by, my love. You are doing the right thing in doing so. No matter what another may say, even myself can never change what you instincts can guide you, Now, if what a person says matches your instincts, you are in harmony - which is a lovely feeling in itself and rare.

Kat:  These are the conversations I like and admire to have with others on my post as well. I keep saying to people, if you want a Badabing bar, go open one up, I'll close the place and come over and play. But here ( my post) I like just plain fun and good conversation.

Tatts: I like myself

Kat:  And you should like yourself. I'm happy that you do, love. You can't like others if you don't like yourself.
I know I do. I say every morning... ok Kat, time for another adventure, be open, be nice and don't let the door slap you on your ass! lol!

Tatts:  I like myself for whatever I am.
I don't like the 17th birthday. But, I occupy myself with other things. I don't let the past bog me down. if somebody doesn't like me, I quietly move. No complaints.

Kat:  I too have no complaints...just frustrations.

Tatts: I am terrible at diplomacy. I speak up if I feel I should give an opinion. Else, I keep my mouth shut.

Tatts:  I felt you are fond of me. That you are straightforward.
That's why I wrote this much.

 Kat:  And I am very very fond of you, love.

Kat:  At 17. my father left home, had an affair. Left us and mom went back to NYC for a time. It was difficult hold the fort with Mom. I later Forgave my father after their divorce and we got along till his death... we made peace and I love and miss him.
But during that 17th year in my life, I saw a strong woman in mom and said to myself... I can never be like her...but now that I am where I am today. According to a friend I have known for over 30 years... she said. Kate as she calls me from our radio days... you are the strongest woman I know. The sweetest and kind human being, you have never let me or anyone down... your parents are looking at you, proudly. I hope things are better for you. You are family to me. I said thank you so much. That means lots from you.

Tatts: Your friend assessed you very well. Even from long distance, i get the same feeling about you. That's honest, Kat. Luv

Kat:  I have come to know that when responding to someone, they may not deserve your diplomacy. So it's ok if you responded they way you did or do. We all can apologize but there are many times you just got to say something without holding back. Being straightforward is an admired quality, love. I have noticed that very much.

Tatts: I salute you. Brave person.

Kat: Thank you, love. I am the same online as I am in person. No need to be another persona. God it's tough enough being me why should I spend my time being a fake..I don't understand some people.

Tatts: The me inside me tells me that, Kat.

Kat: and I salute you too, Tatts.

Tatts: I don't understand one bit about lots of people. Here as well as in real life. They seem to have a personality disorder. Fakeness. Two faced. Possibly even more than two faces. God!

Kat: Yes some people have multiple personalities...yikes!

Tatts: So true reflections of the realities. Lovely words. Lovely song.

 Kat: Not to say we were all ugly girls as the song may imply... though some of us had awkward situations... so we can relate from it one way or another.

 

Tatts: Exactly, Kat.

Kat:  glad you liked it

Tatts: Oh yes. Lovely.

Tatts: Loveliest written communication i have had with anybody in a long, long time.

Kat: Maybe it should be a blog. lol

Tatts: A grand two-way communication.
I often talk to my inner self this way.

Kat: I do have a blog. Gosh I need to write something soon. I have neglected that. lately. But I do have lots of poetry and other written works, photography and videos I have made over the years. It's nice to have a home to share, for others to read.

Tatts: That must be lovely, Kat

Kat: I write my inner self on the page a lot. lol Helps me make sense of myself, right?

Tatts: Mono-dialogue is my own word. lol

Oh and by the way the song we were discussing 

is just below

Random Thoughts - Blooming Flowers!

 I was very fortunate to visit some friends for a Memorial day cookout and took some photos of their lovely flowers.
I am simply fascinated by their shapes sizes and most of all... Color!

 Each flower has it's own distinctive shape and welcomes the others to form a mini parade
all on their own.
So majestic, so wonderful and lively.










 It's been raining like the blazes here in Central
 Virginia... more in the month of May
than in  April. I've started a raised garden
with hopes to have a few Veggies this year.

I may plant a few flowers...we shall see.
Though I am enjoying the beauty of others garden flowers and gardens of all sorts.
Spring may have been a real wet one...
But such wonders as these are flowers are a gift
to enjoy and make lovely photos to enjoy for
many passing seasons.
I hope you find small treasures around you this Spring and Summer.... cherish the small things 
we all take for granted. Be with nature as they smile at you. Until next time, find joy in all that you do. I love you... K'

Random Thoughts -

I write when I have something to say. These last few months gathering my thoughts, absorbing relishing memories and how it adds up with present day reality. 
Spring is here and so are my allergies! It took its toll on me this year - so I struggle like many trying to enjoy the weather while suffering just to breathe!
Time to mow the lawn and grow a garden. The rain this past week has stalled the mowing and the weeds have gone wild. The seedlings are flourishing and I am anticipating a nice small garden for myself. I'm excited about how simple I have my life now - when at one time it was too complicated to figure out some resolution towards peace.

I manage to find peace taking a drive in the county along with my camera, capturing moments of appreciating all that I have - which isn't much. Though I'm all I've got in this world and that's ok. 
I've never dreamed I's be alone. You don't dream those things. Your dreams can be a spectacular technicolor cinematic wonder. whether it comes true, it's up to you. However, there are things in life that happen so unpredictable, so challenging, so unbelievable - they halt and stall the progression attain your dream.... then you wonder, if your dream will ever come true.

 I'm so much like this old house that's still standing, lol. Every time I see it - it's like it wants to say something. I'm sure it holds some very interesting stories. My mind holds many stories and I'm trying to write them down while I still have my long memory intact. I don't care to share everyday life on social media - too much bullshit goes on - plus majority of the time, people don't give a shit what you do - much less care what you are all about. Lots of them are so into themselves, they forget how a simple "hello, how are you?" can lift someone's spirits. When was the last time you lifted someone's spirits?
Instead, I do find stupid rhetoric, trolls posting hateful comments to folks not strong emotionally to take it. Some are downright nasty - you wonder if there is any humanity in them.

You have to have a thick skin to be on social media these days - you never know what you're gonna get. You can post something and people are so offended easily. How did we become so touchy? It's not all about you, nor me...it's just the way it is or isn't it? If  it doesn't make any sense... just roll your eyes and move on.
Looking at this tree, you can see a second tree within...
much like how I have to move around social media. lol!
Have we thrown away consideration and respect for one another? I don't know about you, but I do want to live in peace, not chaos. Peace, is my current dream to come true.
I respect all you have to say - even if I disagree with you and that's ok. That's life. We all have something to say and dreams to share. You've heard the phrase life is a beautiful struggle... Well, it is to me and many. We all try to make the best with what we've got.

 So this is the post I have seen lots on social media - take heed to the message. Personally, I' am a strong people by default. I don't care what you think of me nor I give a shit if you judge me as to who the hell are you to do that. If you can't look me in the eye and tell me how you feel about me... In my neighborhood we'd say...you ain't got no balls.
And as far as your dreams coming true... for me, They can come true anytime cause I still believe in them... no matter how  hard  the struggle in life has been. Hey, it's all temporary.
My memory is long and I'm writing random thoughts while I still have my mind.

Thank you for reading and I welcome your comments with utmost respect. Have a pleasant life's journey. Until next time, I love you, Kat

Born On Valentine's Day!

Being born on Valentine's Day has it's plus and minuses.
Great time if you're a kid... You DO get lots of Valentines for sure... As an adult, it's been blah, blah blah...
Though, I am grateful to be a kind loving human being, who  appreciates the simplest of sweet gestures. I enjoy all who go out of their way, to show how much they care for those they love. It's amazing!
I watched many come out of stores with handful of balloons. Some with bouquets of flowers and candy... some milling over finding the right card that shows the sentiment of their heart.
I was born, on such such a sweet day, indeed.
I may be alone on my Valentine's Birthday, though in spirit, I know I am loved. Loved so much... and grateful to be the person I am today. Love to me is the most beautiful powerful force in the universe which many emotions derive from it.
I have my minuses: few material things I  have in this world.... But my big plus: is my heart. For that, I am the fucking richest woman on Valentine's day!....
Happy Valentine's Day to you! and Happy birthday to me!

Let's Dance!

 The snow storm has passed. I have two days of photos taken from my front door walkway.
I have no idea how long it will take to shovel my way out, as I'm not getting younger... lol!
Though I and grateful not to lose power, for a bit it seemed touch and go. You never know what a storm can bring... Going out every two hours to shovel my front walk way as it is my only way out... I'll be resting with a good night's sleep.
I hope everyone that had gone through this is safe.
Everyone stayed off the roads... but I do dread if we can venture out Monday... we shall see. Be safe and enjoy the quiet treacherous beauty that Winter can be.

Wishing all the best in 2016. Thanks for stopping by!! Will post one.... Coming soon!
A very safe and Happy New Year to you. Love you, Kat