Sunday, December 20, 2015

The Best Present to Self



To me, Christmas is a time of giving
 and it's an all year thing. I am a giver my nature - no use changing that! This week I read a beautiful post from a mentor friend of mine who acknowledged me in regards to her work in Extraordinary Thinking - which she created some 30 + years ago. I have been using this method of thinking for 19 years and it's been a life saver - truly. I wanted to share with you an email I wrote to her back in December 2008 as I had just completed Cancer treatment. I wanted to share how grateful I am for living, for being my true SELF. I do understand that this time of year can be rough for many of us, like myself, without family, or friends to share the holidays with. I am okay with this, while many are not... I get it. I do. Though we can look at life as a Debbie Downer and allow the downer to take complete hold of your life... our mindset of the ordinary is like that. But I'm sorry, I don't think that way anymore.

 I strive to be happy and I do want more happiness in my life.Sure I get depressed just like anyone else - I'm still as human as the next... but the difference is - I have learned to set boundaries, time limits that the downs have no right to take over what I truly desire - and that is, to be happy. Just know that you can change for the better by being the best of who you are. Take time away from all the hustle and bustle of life and get to really know your SELF, know who you really are. Clean out your soul house by making amends with yourself. Learn to love, take care of yourself - because you can't depend on others to do that for you - you are your own world. SO if you can take care of yourself, you can easily take care and love others with ease and peace of mind. Things may not be easy, but they are not hard if you go forth and just do it. We take risks and gambles in life, don't we? well take a big risk this coming year in getting to know yourself - you won't regret it... you've heard the saying.... you ARE your own best friend. Then when you are alone this holiday season like myself - you can say, I may be alone -  I'm not sad, but happy to have this time to give my SELF a present and that is to acknowledge and celebrate the person that I am. I am grateful to just breathe. And no matter what religion denomination or higher being you believe in.... know you have the free will to be, just you. It's my desire this inspires you, to try to be your best. I love you, Kat





 Here's the letter:



Dix:
When I think back of all the work I went through with you, I feel relieved. knowing that I can overcome whatever comes my way, any which way, Surprise! Boom! Wham! I'm a great catcher,
I've caught all the balls and I'm still wearing my mitt proudly. And if by chance I drop the ball...which I have, I'll just pick it up and throw it back. But I'm having a grateful time in life doing it.
As I near the end of my 'life interrupted'.... I know that I would not have made it through these pass
9 months...like Baseball the 9 innings without going through the courageous challenge of going through Partswork and learning Extraordinary Thinking and becoming and returning to the Self I was
when born. I would have died without the peace of mind I have in my heart today. I would have given up instead of being a 'Rocky Balboa', being that underdog fighting for what I believe in...which is ME.

I have face all the demons I can face, and have conquered them all. I feel greater than Alexander the Great, the a world Emperor to a mighty empire. Nothing can destroy me because I fought bravely
and believed so hard and knew, that my expiration date is NOT due yet. I still have many things to do and even though my health has given me a 'pause' to my once rushed life, I made amends,
to listen to my body, when it is exhausted and rest accordingly.

From the my many observations at my daily hospital visits for chemo, shots, tests, and radiation there were so many faces I knew and felt would never return. I knew because they had this given-up
look in their eyes....so sad to see... that I would come home crying in accepting that this is THEIR
choice and grateful my choice to fight and live was mine to keep.

No shoulda, woulda, coulda, here. I have accepted all with grace.
And I am not the same person before the cancer, even with the Partwork, it made me a better human being.

So the delay in writing or having writer's block is a myth. I mean what an adventure and challenge, I just went through. All I can think about is getting a tattoo of a skull with crossbones and have engraved on it... Breast Cancer survivor Stage 2  2008 and I will, soon as I get the doc's ok.

This was a different challenge than the first. The first was the Journey out of The Well. This was a war I fought and conquered. It was a game and  I displayed true Sportsmanship, all nine innings, gloriously.

I am eager to hit the keys on my laptop soon. I'm now ready to say what I feel. And I will say how I feel and some may not like it...but hey, it will be the truth because the truth is all I really know...
and you can NEVER go wrong with telling was is true to one's self, right?

All I want for Christmas is a hug from you.

and to thank you for giving me the challenge I couldn't pass up. It's time to tell my story, it is time to change the world and why not? I changed for the better and it gets better every single day. So people have to know that all in life's challenges are small, and temporary, if your belief in yourself -this is greater than life itself. God granted us FREE WILL .... we should wear that medal with true honor and grace.

Thank you for your time to read this. I trust you and Mack are doing well.
Hello to all and you know that I love you so very much.

Kat










Tuesday, December 8, 2015

Who's The Grown Up Between Us Two (Poem)



Sometimes you lose to gain something new

a lesson to learn and we've learned quite a few

but what you've lost may not be regain

as time is the factor, time is the main.

Someone's wrong can be someone's right

and what looks ahead is not a pleasant sight

for all involved, a circle of storms

mixed together like a bag of worms

mixed together like a bag of worms.

You live in your truth and you are misunderstood

for things you believe, say are good

but some take differently to what you say

they don't think of it as good but more a betray.

So you try and try to explain yourself

but no one listens when anger instills

yet they judge without, hearing your words

and they are just words, words unheard

they are just words, words unheard.

And pain creeps in and surround you

for you meant no harm, but its harmed you

emotionally physically this pain envelopes you

something has died inside with all you're going through.



When you don't read and understand both sides of one
you judge what is wrong without really knowing the one

the reason why they did, what they've done

instead you judge them harshly

sentenced  a friendship, out to be hung.

sentence a friendship, out to be hung.

If you feel I mistrusted you why don't you tell me

why do you hide, why you disown me

is it because your feelings got the best of you

why don't you share what's really inside you?

why don't you own up to what truly

is making you blue?

If  you don't care to listen to whatever I have to say

your way is to disengage doesn't help

while I breathe for peace and a better day

the gift of forgiveness is at play

the gift of forgiveness is at play.

My door is left open while yours is closed

who holds the cards, who has fold-ed

if you value friendship as I do to you

who's the grown up between us two

who 's the grown up between us two.